Speaking Up as a Talent

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This year’s talent show for my club is one that I will never forget.

Our club’s annual talent show is always a blast to come and attend. During this event you witness your friends and members of the club showcasing their talents. These talents can range from as simple as singing to as complex as making a painting upside down.

Prior to the event, I had only  intended on doing one thing: dancing. Featured is above is our K-Pop group, Two Frozen Tubig, doing a dance cover to TWICE’s “TT”. How time has flown by. It feels like just yesterday that I had performed a K-Pop song with two of my friends and now our group has grown to about nine people. Next year the group might even be bigger, but we shall see! I had also helped out with Project Obvious again, the modern dance group of our club. I co-choreographed with one of my close friends to “Side to Side” by Ariana Grande. Being a part of the closing act was a lot of fun as well as performing in with the group, but honestly I was proud of myself for stepping out of my comfort zone.

One thing turned into two things: I had decided to share the poems I had wrote over the past few months and perform a spoken word.

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Let me tell you, as someone who has performed in shows for theater and danced in front of large crowds, I was super nervous for this. Sharing my poems was pretty much sharing a piece of me, a major part of my life. I had only originally prepared one poem from a few months back, but after a series of events had happened this past week I got inspired. So I wrote a second one the morning of the show.

Once those curtains opened, I felt like I could not speak. A friend had told me I would not be able to see anyone with the lights in front of me, which usually you would not, but I was able to see everyone. The experience was nerve wrecking, but comforting at the same time. I felt easier to just talk and share what I had to say to people I was friends with.

I wanted them to know what I saw.

I shared my first poem, “Zippers”. This poem was about dealing with depression and facing the dilemma head on. In the poem I talked about how I want to share what is happening but the difficulty to do so was immense. How you want to just free yourself of the weight that holds you down, but you are afraid to let people in.

The second poem, that was spontaneously written, was about love. The poem was about talking to your crush, or that special eye candy, for the first time. How much courage is taken to actually take on the challenge to make the first move. The build up to actually saying “Hi” is so intense and such a hill to climb that it actually is seen as a personal achievement when the event occurs.

During both poems, I felt so exposed. I felt like my heart was going to explode. Both poems I was literally on the verge of tears because it felt like  a release. A release of my feelings and all the pent up stress because I threw myself out there and threw 2016 under the bus because 2016 was a bitch to me. A release of what I really want for myself and how I want to take a chance at something I thought I could not have or obtain.

In a way, the poems reflected 2016 and 2017. 2016 I was unhappy with my life and wanted to unzip so badly. 2017 I wanted to change that and take a leap of faith, like saying hi to the guy I really like. In my second poem, “Hi”, I mention how I was not sure if the other would even want to deal with a person like me who’s heart has given up so many times. However as days pass I decide to take the chance and get closer to my goal.

Hopefully 2017 will be that way for me, whether it be through academic success, becoming more fit, or falling in love again.

I will not share the written poems on here but once the videos go up I will share the link.

Thank you so much again to all those who came out to support the performers at the talent show, and a big thank you to those who have supported me throughout the years, and especially during 2016, and in me delivering my first spoken word performance.

I love you all, and I hope you enjoy your Sundaze!

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